I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Randomize
