Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
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