we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
