EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
