STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
