found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
be right there i have to get my cape
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize
