that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
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