a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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