when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
