I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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