My friends, they love my intelligence
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
