I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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