ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
