these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
