You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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