There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
