when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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