i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize
