but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
