Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
