i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Swine flu is the new snow day.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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