i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
