they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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