I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
