Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
