Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
