Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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