Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
She needs sedatives and a leash
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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