Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
