This girl is more easily done than said...
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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