I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Moan for me like Helen Keller
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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