there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
