I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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