i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
