you guys were way drunker than both of me
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
