So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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