Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
