It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
