He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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