Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
