I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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