I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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