bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
The Olympian is in my bed
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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