Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
