so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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