What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
