oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
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