Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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