Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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