I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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